SHE WON!!!

Kate Winslet won the Oscar for Best Actress for the Reader! I was screaming and crying! Go Kate you are such an inspiration to people everywhere. I loved seeing your dad so funny. I feel like all is right with the world because her talent is recognized. I must say that I thought it would be for Revolutionary Road which I found to be the better film, but I am still glad she won. Oh, and why didn't R.R. win any awards? Maybe because two films walked away with almost everything. I still need to see Slum dog Millionaire. I saw The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and liked it, but I still loved Revolutionary Road the most of all of those films nominated.

Oh what a beautiful morning...

Today has been really great. I think that is in part to the fantastic weekend which proceeded it. Jaden and I have been out watering the trees in the backyard and I have been planning stuff for outside. Then I actually went grocery shopping with just myself and Jaden. It wasn't as scary as I thought it would be. hehe

So the weekend...

Friday: Some hanging out at Zhana's house with a couple other people.

Sat: Potluck and then Sock class. I definitely had a better time at the sock class. I think this time I noticed being ignored. I was just sitting knitting and I would realize that everyone was talking and I was on my own. I am perfectly okay with being on my own and am actually turned off by needy people, but I felt like I should make an effort to talk to others even if they didn't talk to me. So I ended up talking to a 18 yr. old boy exchange student who doesn't even knit. LOL Sock class was good I really like Amber one of the girls there. I love how she sees things and am kind of sad that she will be moving to Austin soon. The best part of the night for me was getting to see the United States of Tara!!! I absolutely love this show. Great cast and hilarious writing. It's not often that I find something I enjoy every aspect. Got home at 3am and then went to bed at 4am.

Sun: Wake up too early for the tiredness I felt, threw on some clothes, and left for Jorge and DJ's so much fun. Every time I am around them I am reminded of how much I would like to hang out with them all the time! Something interesting to say on every topic. I walk away from time with them a better person and I love them for that. They got Jaden a little Barrel of Monkeys game and we all went out to eat at possibly the most beautiful restaurant in the city. Jaden loved the birds and fountains. I loved my pina colada. Lots of alcohol this weekend. They told me the names of lots of great restaurants that I didn't even know of. See that's the walking away smarter. Love you guys!

Today I bought a bird feeder. I want a bird bath as well and some backyard toys for Jaden and a garden and hehehe. I love seeing the wildlife in the backyard. I have been reading a ton of blogs online recently and everyone has pictures! I must learn how to do this because my blog is boring even me. hehe

Where's my flippin' gene?

I tried again to make bread with the worst results yet. I don't even know if I did the yeast right because I did something else much worse. I put the bowl the bread was rising on the stove because I remembered it needed to be in a warm place. My stove has this warm setting in the middle so I turn it on and left the bread there. Half of my bread is now cooked and the other half of the bowl is still dough. And by cooked I mean black and I burned myself. Then I ruined the rest of dinner. Added too much angel hair and cooked it too long. Craptacular!

So the Spence gals called me today. They had read my blog and thought I could use some fun. Would I like to go to Las Vegas with them for a long weekend? Hmm, yeah, a 2 yr. old in Vegas oh wait I think I hear CPS knocking at my door. They wanted me to just drop him off at someone's house for 4 days. haha Girls I love you, but seriously! But they are going to have some cocktails for me. ;)

So I didn't do one selfish or enjoyable thing all day. I cleaned, cooked, dusted, laundry, etc. Do I feel good about all I accomplished? No because I failed at cooking! But I have my Modest Mouse to get me through my failure and my burnt finger. I am going to take my MM on the road. Pound the pavement. It gets me through a lot these days. Every worry or pissed off feeling I imagine my foot slamming it out of my mind.

I can't wait for Spring this gal needs life blossoming around her. I need the flowers growing the trees getting leaves and the peaches coming into view. I need an adventure maybe I will run to California my favorite place.

Valentine's Weekend

One of the best Thursday through Sunday's on record:

Thurs: Jaden was FANTASTIC all morning. I mean the angel child. I was in heaven. That night I had a scavenger hunt to find my gifts which were Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, Prince Caspian, and Golden Compass. Plus a day off of work! So late into the night watching Golden Compass and knitting!

Fri: Fun family time. Then shopping for summer clothes for Jaden. Then girl's night out!!! California Pizza Kitchen with the girls. yummy Then CORALINE!!! Fantastic wonderful film! Best cartoon by that director yet! Then hang out with the girls at Starbucks just chilling and talking about life.

Sat: Wake up in a blur from night out lateness. Up really early and then off to Austin with Kate, Lauren, & MB to meet the Ravelry crew sans Bob. Fun at the Knitting Nest. I bought yarn. I know. I know. But I got a cute bag to immortalize Ravelry visiting Texas with the purchase! Let's see I bought three skeins of Peace Fleece and two of Cascade 220 Superwash. The good thing about this purchase is that I will be knitting it up quickly and then it leaves my house! Then wonderful after the long wait bunch at Magnolia. Then Hill Country Weavers were some perfect retro 70's sock yarn screamed "you must own me I am so cool and no one realizes it!" Then to the most awesome random thing in the city. Hey, Cupcake! Gives me faith in this world that something as strange as this can bloom and thrive. Bought Will half a dozen basically one of every cupcake they had. Then with a promise of a tattoo in the future the weary travels returned home. Where I collapsed while he and Jaden ate almost all of the cupcakes.

Sun: Knitting and reading plenty. Highlight... we bought Jaden a bubble blowing machine. Took it out in the front yard and literally filled the street with bubbles. Jaden running around crazy playing. So fantastic. The neighborhood kids taking pictures of all of the bubbles with their phones. Some of them even chased after the bubbles. Laying on the driveway starring at a fantastical world. Priceless. Leaving out the bad parts of the car breaking down because the bubbles blew the anger away while I watched Jaden laugh with delight.

Girl Scout Cookies

It's that time of year again. And of course you have to buy them even if it means an extra hour walk to make up for it. They carry so many memories. I remember selling these things, then buying them for me, then for me and my husband, and now for me, husband, and son! Man, I am getting old good thing I don't have a daughter because then the next step would be taking her around to do it. But there is no way you would ever find me being a troop leader like my mom was it would be scary because man when I go into business leader mode run!

So it's almost the half way point on another month. Knitting is going fantastic. I have become obsessed with Children in Common and have been knitting a sock per day for them. It feels so good to be making something that will help someone who really needs it. This might be this child's only pair of socks without holes in it. Look at me and my over 50 skeins of sock yarn; it brings on the guilt. My FLS is going well I still don't like the O-wool, but I have stopped picking out everything. My friend Leah told me how to fix the problem by washing it at the end in cheap conditioner. Running going okay. I need new shoes! I have decided that for every mile I run that will count as one dollar towards the purchase of new shoes. My reading is slow right now as well. Balance in life is one of the hardest things.

Zhana has been helping me with my Russian a lot and man my heart is just glowing with love for that land. I can't wait to go there! I have been reading a lot about the Revolution and next time all of us Russians and wanna bes get together I am going to ask opinions about it.

STOP

So as if yesterday were not bad enough... Today my work called me in for a staff meeting. Immediately my flags went up because this is weird. They laid off 3/4 of the people in the room including me. Oh and then I had a dentist appointment today where the stupid guy was fixing some old fillings. He slipped with the drill and cut off a chunk of my back gums. I am in more pain than I knew could be possible way more than childbirth. I think I might go in to the ER and see what they can give me because I can't eat or talk without the blood starting to flow again! Oh yeah, and we aren't done. My husbands work laid off another 20 people today and his boss told him to start looking around for more jobs because they are going to be doing that every month until either the employees are all gone or the economy majorly turns around. I swear God if one more bad thing happens I am throwing in the towel. One more will break me. I have no idea what I did to deserve this.

Dear Life

I would like to thank you for your recent application to add more "things" into my life, but at this present moment all of my worry spots are filled up good luck with your hunt for others to impart your "adventures" on.

So my dad called me today and said that he is trying to get back together with my mom. He said she is confused! No crap! He asked me to pray that she would have clarity and choose him. How wonderfully unselfish! Now let me ask you dear father are you doing this because you miss her or because you have been out of work for months and can't afford your rent? Or are you doing it because now that she is almost engaged to another man you want to add a little more confusion to her life? I can't relive the worst years of my life over and over again just because you decide to come back and leave, come back and leave! You are the most selfish person I have ever meet.

One friend out of the hospital doing well and another friend in. I can't even talk about how my heart is breaking right now. I can't even think of all of the times I should have called them just to say hi. I loathe myself for saying oh I don't have the time to talk right now when I didn't know how little time you had left.

It's all weighing down. To have lost so much in barely a month. I just have to try to stay positive or I will lose my mind. I know a lot of friends and family have been texting me saying I should write about Jaden on here so they can read it, but I don't think I will feel like writing or anything for awhile till I can get my head around everything.

Month In Review

So Jan. is over. I still haven't knit up all of the yarn I wanted to, but I will. I am not where I want to be weight wise. Man, okay must find some positives. I did get a lot of knitting done and I have been eating better. I did a ton of reading!

I am feeling a lot better right now. I talked to my friend Leah and I think she gets me. I like things to be fun and mellow. I love listening to my friends when they are having a hard time. I really want to be there for people. Some things can weigh on me. I don't know where I got this peace-maker/keeper mentality, but it is growing stronger as I age. I know life can't always be positive, but I wish we could all "smile on your brother, everybody get together try to love one another right now". Maybe I am wrong in this maybe I need to change my personality. But I really feel that if I was wrong it wouldn't make me physically ill to be around negativity. I know that I probably get annoying to people with my wanting peace and happiness, but I hope they can appreciate that it comes from a real place in me.

Feb. Goals:
~Run 10 miles
~Read 3 books
~Finished Jan. Projects, get far into Feb. Lady Sweater, and do one pair of socks.